Car Audio Picstory v5.x (56k? Hah, no.)

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Thread: Car Audio Picstory v5.x (56k? Hah, no.)

  1. #1

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: Boston, MA
    ME: JP6 / Carvin CS4
    MA: Martin DC-1E
    Rig: Axe-Fx II XL
    PSN: CQ7String777

    iTrader: 34 (100%)

    Car Audio Picstory v5.x (56k? Hah, no.)

    Car Audio Picstory v5.wtfever: (How to make a simple deck replacement take 5 hours)

    Shit you'll need:

    • 1. A car.
    • 2. A year old Alpine stereo with electrical issues.
    • 3. A pile of new crap.
    • 4. Friends.
    • 5. A heated garage.
    • 6. Lots of beer.

    Friends and car are optional, but anything you do in a heated garage is pure win, so that's a must have. Along with beer.

    Anyhow, since I have all of the above things, I think I'm good to go. Behold, a car:

    A pile of new crap:

    Aforementioned Alpine Deck, complete with piece of shit Scoche install kit that left a fucking gap between my heater controls and the stereo.

    Off we go, nice sunny New England day.

    And not too cold:

    Friend, and middle finger(s):

    Also necessary.

    He's coming up to use the garage as well. When you're on the highway with your friend, shenanigans ensue the entire way.

    A quick stop to get some connectors, solder, misc bullshit.

    And some beer.

    Aforementioned friends, garage, and unmovable engine hoist that somehow managed not to have my doors smack into it.

    Car, in garage:

    Aaaaand go.

    Everyone likes taking my shit apart, it's a party in my car of unscrewing, unlike Drew's mom on friday nights.

    Starting to come apart. This part sucks, btw.


    Why a picture of my third brake light? Well, I have an idea.

    Oh my.

    Oh, hi. I look so happy!

    Friends, beer, middle fingers.

    Gotta get to these eventually:

    Hm, what's going on here? I thought we were just swapping out a head unit?

    Well, may as well take the back seats out.

    All of them, in fact.

    While we're at it, let's pull the rear deck off too. Now I'm ready for the rally course!

    If you make a metal face while cleaning the windows, they come out better.

    Especially if you don't notice someone taking your pic while you're doing it.

    Anyway, back to scrub-a-dubbing.

    YEAH, CLEAN THAT SHIT. How many times do you really get access to those hard-to-reach-corners, amirite?

    Since the floor is wet and dirty, clearly the best place for my back seats is in the trash.

    Oh, hello XM reciever. Since I'm smart, I take a pic of the Radio ID because it's on the bottom of the control unit, which will be bolted down. Which like, makes it harder to see the bottom.

    Back to my brake light again. Look, it's glue, and a giant washer. WTF, you say?

    Tah-dah! The XM antenna is magnetic, because normal people put it on their roof. But because that looks like shit, and I don't like my car to look like shit, I opted to put the antenna here. Which was way, way more work than I realized it would be. Thanks to my buddy Tony for the slick glue-and-washer technique, which lets the antenna stick through the plastic housing w/o moving around and w/o having to drill into it.

    Of course, we still haven't touched all this crap here:


    Tony's happy about my antenna-in-brake-light idea.

    Now to fuck with the SWI interface that lets my stock steering wheel controls work with the new radio. Programming it requires a degree in physics and the owner's manual for the stupid ass 3"x2" plastic box with one button on it is about as big as the one for my stereo. Since we need to determine the impedance coming down the wire from the stock controls, I present the O.U.C.H.-o-meter.

    And at the same time, we put the back of my car back together.

    ...And still haven't gotten around to any of this yet.

    However, voila! The remote bass control for my sub amp, the SWI box of how-the-fuck-do-you-program-this-thing doom, and the Sirius reciever. Why are they in here, you ask? Because if one of them breaks, I don't want to have to do the above pic again and rip my fucking car apart to replace it.

    Putting all that shit in there, however, requires some drilling. Which is always cool anyway. Just ask JJ.

    Now, since there's pieces of my car everywhere, and my seats are still in the garbage, the only proper place for tomato-and-jalapeno pizza is safely atop the fiberglass insulation.

    Oh, look, more wires.

    Those instructions are just PART of the programming guide for the SWI box. Fuck that thing. It still doesn't work right now. We did the same procedure on it about a dozen times with a dozen different results. It does "stuff", but volume up is now source, down is mute, and source is colume up. Or something.

    Anyway, time to start wiring that shit back up.

    Hey, it works!

    Well, let's put that fucker in the hole then.

    Which requires two people, and a cool 12v mini drop-light.

    And a lot of fiddling around. The new mounting kit (A $110 custom job, since there are no double-din units for my car) is VERY tight, so if the deck isn't abso-fucking-lutely perfectly aligned, it catches on the kit when you open it. FYI, getting it right takes a very long time to achieve.

    So I recommend you take a little power nap, while your friends deal with it.

    All of this drinking, reading, screwing, hole-filling and car will drain your battery, so it's handy to have friends with not only a heated garage, but a charger as well.

    Starting to come together!

    Oh, back to this. Nobody sits back there anyway since my car is designed to have midgets in the back seat, and I don't know any midgets. Other than Dave, actually. But I make him ride in the trunk with my golf clubs.

    Testing it with the iPhone. It works, charges the phone, syncs with bluetooth, and has a handsfree mic that I didn't take a pic of, but it mounted on the driver's A-Pillar.

    That done, time for some drinks.

    And now, the end result! The Sirius antenna front and center, because doing this sucked the most.

    'Ze deck:

    'Ze Kamelot DVD:

    The small remote control for the thing.

    And the whole shebang. Note the iPod cable comign out of the dash, whereas previously it ran out in the open along the passenger footwell. This is way cleaner, and has just enough strain relief on the cable. The holder is a Proclip mount, which is expensive but made for my car and requires no dash-drilling, which is good.

    Voila! One happy car stereo.

  2. #2

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: In the 6.0.3
    ME: Ibanez Jem G-Vine
    Rig: Blinky Lights and Beer
    XBL: ruDisturbed
    PSN: ru_disturbed

    iTrader: 0

    Epic.... Awesome..... Jealous!

  3. #3

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: In a trench, Vietnam.

    iTrader: 0

    Hahaha I winced a little bit at the pizza atop the insulation

  4. #4

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: Ohio
    ME: Schecter Loomis 7
    Rig: Boss GT-8

    iTrader: 0

    Who fucking needs a house? You could just live in your car.
    The only proof he needed for the existance of God was music.
    Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

    Without music, life would be a mistake.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

  5. #5

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Cracow, Poland
    ME: Camo COW7
    Rig: Behringer GM108 15W

    iTrader: 0

    That is Bad Ass

  6. #6

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: In a trench, Vietnam.

    iTrader: 0

    I hear that next week Chris is installing pro tools into his head rests so he can widdly-widdly whilst BBQ'ing ribs on the grill he's going to install into the front passenger seat.

  7. #7

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: The B.L., WA.
    ME: Buckethead Les Paul
    MA: Washburn
    Rig: Titan Custom

    iTrader: 21 (100%)

    I approve of the cheap beer in this thread.

  8. #8

    Join Date: Dec 2008
    Location: San Diego, CA
    ME: Jackson Fusion HH
    MA: Seagull S6
    MB: Farts
    Rig: POD HD500

    iTrader: 2 (100%)

    Awesome job, there's no way in hell I would have attempted doing that to my own car.

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