So I started a new job this week...

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Thread: So I started a new job this week...

  1. #1

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: In a trench, Vietnam.

    iTrader: 0

    So I started a new job this week...

    ...but fuck that shit. I cooked ribs today here's how that shit went.

    So I heard rumour of this dude who slices pig for a living, "The Butcher" they call him. I sought council from him and, for 8, departed from the Chapel of the Massacred Beast with these:

    As you can see, I took them home, laid them on a big slab of wood and took a picture. This is what you are looking at now...actually you're probably reading this, have a quick glance back. There you go.

    Ingredients for the dry rub.

    Now, usually, I make my own curry powder but was feeling really lazy today and was stuck between using this selection of spices (I'd gladly snort lines of smoked paprika, seriously that stuff smells nothing short of divine) and the herbs/spices used in traditional Trinidad style "Green Seasoning". I went with the above ingredients.

    Rub ingredients combined:

    Pig ribs massaged with a nice jacket of dry rub to make them all sexy and deliciously fashionable. Other pigs were jealous. They told me. What so Eddie Murphy is the only guy allowed to talk to the animals? Fuck yourself.

    Honey Dew Ale...

    Pigs swimming in Honey Dew Ale ready to have the flavour braised the fuck into them.

    Pigs in the oven, slow and a midget prostitute that's taken one too many punches to the face for the sake of her client's sexual gratification.


    Southern Comfort BBQ sauce on the go...

    Boiling down to a nice thick saucy sauce consistency.

    That's right, take a closer look, it won't bite. Seriously, it won't bite. I was cooking these for my family who have very tame palettes, so I had to leave out my usual handful of scotch bonnet chillies

    Back to the ribs.

    Out of the oven for inspection.

    Looking all right, but I think it's time for the first coat of sauce.

    Shove those fuckers back in the oven of love, the love oven...the loven, for a while.

    OK time's up. Time to get all Saucerer's Apprentice on these sexy slabs of dead animal.

    More sauce:

    Back in for more warm, sensual, satisfying ovenation. What's that? Ovenation isn't a word? What so only Beyonce is allowed to make up words? Fuck yourself.

    Fuck! The fuckin' ribs are fuckin' done!

    OK, so before I could take a picture, my natural meat eating urges overwhelmed me and I ate the smaller of the two racks...and three or four of the ribs from the larger rack.

    All the ribs are gone...and right now I feel a mixture of pride, shame, and post-coital euphoria.

    Also, I didn't need all the Honey Dew for braising so I'm finishing the other bottle now, the traditional way
    "I have two ambitions in life: one is to drink every pub dry, the other is to sleep with every woman on earth." - Oliver Reed

    "America blaming BP for the oil spill is like a man punching a prostitute in the face because his own needs disgust him." - Stewart Lee

  2. #2

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: Sheffield, UK

    iTrader: 3 (100%)

    Ribs are so much fun to make and eat. These look delicious. Also reminds me that I haven't eaten in about 8 hours....DAMN THIS THREAD

  3. #3

    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: Boston, MA
    ME: JP6 / Carvin CS4
    MA: Martin DC-1E
    Rig: Axe-Fx II XL

    iTrader: 34 (100%)

    I am now hungry. I declare this thread a success.

  4. #4

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Jacksonville, FL

    iTrader: 1 (100%)

    Looks fan-fucking-tastic dude.

  5. #5

    Join Date: Feb 2009
    Location: Fort Collins, CO
    ME: RG3570z
    MA: Breedlove Pursuit Concert
    Rig: Mesa/Boogie Mark Five:25

    iTrader: 4 (100%)

    Wirelessly posted

    You got me all wet. Um. I mean. My mouth is watering.

  6. #6

    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Norway
    ME: KxK Sii-7
    MA: Ibanez AE
    Rig: Axe-Fx Ultra

    iTrader: 0

    That looked really fucking delicious.

  7. #7

    Join Date: Jan 2011
    Location: Pennsyltucky
    ME: MIJ Tele
    MA: Guild GAD
    Rig: None.

    iTrader: 2 (100%)

    Man, it's been a long time since I had ribs.

  8. #8

    Join Date: Jan 2010
    Location: Damn near the north pole
    ME: EBMM JP7
    MB: Ibanez SDGR 705
    Rig: Axe Fx II

    iTrader: 1 (100%)

    Fuck you AND your ribs™

    Don't worry about people talking behind your back, it just means you're one step ahead and they're in perfect position to kiss your ass!

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