If there's one thing that unites us as guitarists, it's the lifelong quest to find the perfect guitar chair. It's hard to find one that ticks all the boxes, maybe it's uncomfortable, maybe it's from Staples, a store everyone knows is for posers, maybe it has arm rests that limit you to only playing lame shapes, like Strandbergs or whatever.
That sounds like an infomercial pitch, and you probably think I'm about to sell you something. But I'm not. (Not until I get the influencers to endorse it anyways.)
So anyways, there's been this rowing machine from the 90s that I've looked at and thought "that seat is so fucking sick, that's like, a space captain level chair, some serious Star Trek shit, I bet it's perfect for playing guitar in" for what can only be described as a "long ass time".
I've never got around to actually turning it into a guitar chair. Because I thought "what if the urge to row on the rowing machine strikes me?". Now for those of you who don't know about Rowing Machines, they all fucking suck. But anything made before like, 2004, is pretty much classified as a torture device under the Geneva conventions. The ones with the cord you see at the gym are for pussies. The heavy duty ones have hydraulic pistons and shit, which this one had, but the problem with that is it feels nothing like rowing a boat through water, more like rowing through concrete.
So anyways, since I'm slowly setting my new space up I was like, "It's time to finally disassemble that piece of shit and make a fucking awesome guitar chair."
The wood blocks between the rowing machine chair and the vintage 70s base which is a fucking hideous shade or green were selected for maximum tone, as well as supple shock absorbance, and the old '70s heavy duty base need to be painted with some colorful Rustoleum so it doesn't look like something made from parts cannabalized from other things (which is what it is of course), but other than that it works like a charm.
Here is a brief video of it in use. Not that long, because I'm still figuring out how to mix my material that has Hammond B3, Choirs, and Theremin. But you know, if I didn't include a video people would be like, "That's not the ultimate guitar chair". The parts with the guitar double tracked aren't particularly tight, but I didn't track with headphones or any of the conditions (cord instead of wireless, no reverb on the mix, etc.) usually present for a serious go. In terms of tracking this new chair is definitely almost as important a part of my signal chain as my sick ass Miami Vice 80s Bolle prescription glasses I wear to feel the vibe, which I can technically wear inside without being a douche, because they are prescription (not my prescription, but close enough) and they fall on the spectrum in between sunglasses and regular glasses occupied by well known 80s cult leaders, and the neoprene fitness instructor belt I ordered off Amazon prime to house my Boss Wireless unit, since no company makes one intended for mounting on a guitar strap yet.