Nolly Archetype
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Thread: Nolly Archetype

  1. #1


    Join Date: Apr 2010
    Location: Edinburgh, Scotland
    ME: Hacked tele and RGs
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    Nolly Archetype

    Have had a bit of a search but can't see anything here about this...

    https://neuraldsp.com/products/archetype-nolly/

    The demos sound amazing, but hey, it's Nolly so of course they do.

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  3. #2


    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Glasgow - Scotland
    ME: Suhr M5
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    Incoming 4 page essay on how nolly is a shill and that you shouldn't buy this product despite the fact it sounds great and is very convenient.....

  4. #3


    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Cambridgeshire, UK
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nick View Post
    Incoming 4 page essay on how nolly is a shill and that you shouldn't buy this product despite the fact it sounds great and is very convenient.....
    Djent apologist spotted.
    www.numbskullaudio.com
    Recording. Mixing. Mastering. Editing. Re-Amping.

    www.stivesguitarservices.com
    Set-ups. Maintenance. Restoration. Repairs.

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  6. #4


    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Glasgow - Scotland
    ME: Suhr M5
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    Self proclaimed enjoyer of things that are good

  7. #5


    Join Date: Feb 2010
    Location: Laramie, Wyoming
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nick View Post
    Incoming 4 page essay on how nolly is a shill and that you shouldn't buy this product despite the fact it sounds great and is very convenient.....
    What kind of sad, petty person would do something like that?

    I'm not saying this just because I fellate every single product that comes out that is endorsed by the same stale crowd of social media taste makers that has been driving a large segment of the gear market for the better part of the past decade, but I honestly believe this might be the best VST of the year.

    Maybe the best VST in the history of computing. In terms of the history of computer programs, this is like, on par with the Ultima series, or the programs that landed the curiosity rover on mars.

    It might even be on par with the original minesweeper.

    For 135 euros they are practically giving it away. That is like, the same level of generosity as Mother Teresa, or Nelson Mandela.

    I actually bought the program, and a day after using it, my mind was so blown, that I turned myself in to my local police station and I was like, "I practically stole this legendary piece of software officers, cuff me".

    Some guy was like, "This is pretty much the tonal equivalent of the NXIVM cult you fucking idiot."

    Ummmmmmmmmm, wrong. Did the NXIVM cult offer a 9 band EQ?

    That is only one band less than an industry standard 10 band.

    And even better, I hear they are releasing the additional 10th band as a DLC down the line for an additional 15 euros.

    Listen, I have an ear for tone, and I know snake oil when I see it. But as I scrolled down the product page, which had the exact same homogenized sleek layout as every other page designed for the bro-metal crowd, my senses were drinking it all in, and I was like,

    "If this thing wasn't worth the money, why would they feature a generic phoned in quote in bold text? Did the detractors not read the crunch amp has a twist?"

    That's not just hyperbolic ad speak either. This twist is so advanced it's going to make M Night Shalyman look like fucking Kid Rock.

    The twist is worth 135 euros on its own.





    It's literally like, the twist in The Sixth Sense, if the Sixth Sense was a bad Meshuggah rip off with N'Sync vocals.

    Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and donate to the Periphery singers Patreon, those highlights in his hair don't pay for themselves.

  8. #6


    Join Date: Dec 2013
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    It wasn’t 4 pages long but that will do.

  9. #7


    Join Date: Oct 2008
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    Quote Originally Posted by scole View Post
    It wasn’t 4 pages long but that will do.
    Pretty damn funny though

  10. #8


    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Herndon, VA
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    Regardless of Neural DSP's marketing and bro-metal orientation, I ended up getting both the Plini and Parallax VSTs because they are really damned good.

    As for Nolly, he showed up with Misha at a NoVA get-together years ago, and he's a ridiculously talented musician. Shame that he applies that talent to a bunch of metalcore whatever.

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Fractal Audio Systems  Shred Training  Angel Vivaldi
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