How this sub changed me in a great way.
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Thread: How this sub changed me in a great way.

  1. #1


    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
    ME: Ibanez JEM7V
    MA: Enema Bag W/Piezo's

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    How this sub changed me in a great way.

    I've been getting a sad feeling every time I open MG.org and see these threads constantly moving while not participating. I actually got caught up in that last tune I post in here a few weeks back (my sole 10 points) and it hit me like, "You HAVE to finish this song before moving onto anything else." and I'm glad I listened to myself because it opened up a whole different approach to writing music/lyrics for me.

    I was never one to write overly personal lyrics, or at least I'd fashion them so you couldn't specifically point to what I was writing about but something about that tune made me think, "Ok, time to let it all out and get as personal as I can get". Being totally honest, I spent a few days just trying to get through tracking vocals without bursting into tears and I think I had to have that happen in order for me to move onto the next step of my music.

    So thank you, gentlemen. While I'm sure it would have happened at some point sooner than later, this whole contest pushed it further ahead for me and I'm beyond thankful for that.

    The tune is still in the mixing stages and I might change some stuff with the solo, but here it 'tis with the vocals.



    Lyrics-

    I burned the evidence of my old self
    I put the ashes in a box I keep close
    Blade to throat I'd say it's all gone away
    Truth be told, I think it's safer this way

    And I thought it was over
    But I just hadn't tried
    I can't grow any older
    With these thorns in my side

    Run away from the place that's meant for better men
    Hide your face from those you feel are above

    And I thought it was over
    But I just hadn't tried
    I can't grow any older
    With these thorns in my side

    Such a fine disaster
    Such a fine disaster

    And I thought it was over
    But I just hadn't tried
    I can't grow any older
    With these thorns in my side

    Such a fine disaster
    Such a fine disaster

    (You can also substitute "Slimy bastard" for "fine disaster"!
    "It's ONE WHOLE MILLIMETER"


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  3. #2


    Join Date: Dec 2011
    Location: vancouver, bc

    iTrader: 2 (100%)

    i'm stuck in that rut of never quite being able to make my lyrics directly personal. Music is easy to hide in ambiguity even though i know where it came from.

    kudos for keeping it real and letting it flow
    Spoiler
    Jesus dies at the end....

  4. #3


    Join Date: Jan 2009
    Location: Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
    ME: Ibanez JEM7V
    MA: Enema Bag W/Piezo's

    iTrader: 1 (100%)

    It's not easy to just let it out, that's for sure and you're dead on about hiding in ambiguity. Pretty much everything I've written in the past has gone through some kind of tough-guy filter and while I really dig some of the words I've strung together, this is definitely the first one I wrote with the filter off and had the delivery of the vocals match with the lyrical content. NOW I can see how writing lyrics can be therapeutic as where before I just found happiness in clever word play.

    I know now that I've opened that door, the next time it'll be that much easier, so maybe just give yourself a tune to go at it. Even if you don't show the song to anyone or write an alternate version of them, just something to kick that door open to get you started. In the end, we're all humans with insecurity issues. As long as you're not a kid-toucher, I don't think anyone can really say a bad thing about what you put out, ya know?

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  6. #4


    Join Date: Oct 2008
    Location: Seekaaahhhk, MA
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    Well done, Sir. Well done.
    Good on you.

  7. #5


    Join Date: Sep 2008
    Location: 7th plane of ethereal hell
    ME: Ibanez UV7PWH
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    iTrader: 8 (100%)

    Awesome work dude!

  8. #6


    Join Date: Oct 2016
    Location: Corpus Christi
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    Good stuff Rev. Not just the song, but what you went through/are going through, and encourage us to do as well. Love it!
    Tone Chasers Anonymous ™ - I’m not just a member, I’m the President.
    Don’t expect much, it’s not like I’m a rocket surgeon.

  9. #7


    Join Date: Feb 2010
    Location: Laramie, Wyoming
    ME: Jackson AT Pro
    Rig: Rivera K Tre

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rev Drucifer View Post
    a whole different approach to writing music/lyrics for me.
    Lyrics are tough. I usually get like, 60% of them right out of the gate in 15 minutes, but rearranging them into a cohesive structure and connecting them right takes like, at least 4-5 times that long.

    Usually I go for like a mix of sensical real life issues and personal shit, colorful imagery, and obtuse nonsensical metaphysical ranting.

    You can be really personal and serious and still be super oblique. There are some songs that have a linear kind of plot going, but a lot of the best ones are just painting an atmospheric portrait. "Two Minutes to Midnight" is my favorite lyrics of all time and unless you know the backstory to the song, it's just a bunch of really cool imagery painting a bleak picture open to interpretation.

    I mostly stick to traditional rhyming stuff, but I like a lot of the newer extreme metal "non rhyming/non structured" stuff too, so I try to do a mix. The interior rhymes within sentences are harder to do than rhyming lines, but those are some of the most effective.

    Once again, citing "Two Minutes to Midnight", if you really take a look at it you can see all the interior rhymes that put it over the top. Rhyming the ends of lines is your bread and butter, but tight interior rhymes and meter to mix it up is also great. Bruce Dickinson describes it in his autobiography as "Theater of the Mind", which is how I think of it.

    The blind men shout,
    "Let the creatures out
    We'll show the unbelievers."
    Napalm screams of human flames
    For a prime time Belsen feast ... yeah!

    As the reasons for the carnage cut their meat and lick the gravy
    We oil the jaws of the war machine and feed it with our babies.

    The killer's breed or the demon's seed,
    The glamour, the fortune, the pain,
    Go to war again, blood is freedom's stain
    Don't you pray for our soul anymore

    2 minutes to midnight,
    The hands that threaten doom.
    2 minutes to midnight,
    To kill the unborn in the womb.

    [Solo]

    The body bags and little rags of children torn in two
    And the jellied brains of those who remain to put the finger right on you
    As the madmen play on words and make us all dance to their song
    To the tune of starving millions to make a better kind of gun.
    RJD is also very close to Bruce Dickinson for the title of "best lyricist ever". (although of course a lot of Iron Maiden's best lyrics are also Adrian Smith or Steve Harris, and some of the best lyrics Dio sings are Geezer Butler's)

  10. #8


    Join Date: Feb 2010
    Location: Laramie, Wyoming
    ME: Jackson AT Pro
    Rig: Rivera K Tre

    iTrader: 15 (100%)

    Most of the great metal ones do Second Person a lot too, especially Dio. Sort of an art lost to time. Where instead of being sung from the point of "I" or describing the actions of "him/her/them" he's directing it at "you". Usually in the form of some obtuse warning.

    Judas Priest also does second person a lot, and occasionally has legendarily good rhyme schemes and meter like.

    "Amidst the upturned burned-out cars
    The challengers await
    And in their fists clutch iron bars
    With which to seal his fate
    Across his chest in scabbards rest
    The rows of throwing knives
    Whose razor points in challenged tests
    Have finished many lives

    Now facing one another
    The stand-off eats at time
    Then all at once a silence falls
    As the bell ceases its chime
    Upon this sign the challengers
    With shrieks and cries rush forth
    The knives fly out like bullets
    Upon their deadly course
    Screams of pain and agony
    Rend the silent air
    Amidst the dying bodies
    Blood runs everywhere
    The figure stands expressionless
    Impassive and alone
    Unmoved by this victory
    And the seeds of death he's sown"

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