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Wrote and produced a song for my songwriting class would love your feedback

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It's for my popular music songwriting class. I wrote the melody and lyrics, and produced the instrumental behind it. The only thing I didn't do is sing. I've had pretty decent feedback on it from my friends in pop music but I would love to hear from people who prefer something thats probably the opposite of pop in modern music. It's the first song I've written since I was in a death metal band.

https://soundcloud.com/traviswahlremixer%2Ftravis-wahl-embracedemo%2Fs-V5wQr
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Needs more.....music
Can I get tablature?
Sure, I stayed up all night tabbing it.

Code:
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Hope you have an ERG.
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This thread delivers.
You know, I find that everyone here is really pretty supportive and willing to offer feedback on member music, regardless of whether its their particular cup of tea. Nice group of people...

But you fuck up on the link and leave them nothing to do and these cunts are brutal.
Sure, I stayed up all night tabbing it.

Code:
|----------|----------|----------|
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|----------|----------|----------|
|----------|----------|----------|
|----------|----------|----------|
|----------|----------|----------|
|----------|----------|----------|
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Hope you have an ERG.
Can I get your pirated SDMix 2.3 Blub preset?
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Would not listen again.
You know, I find that everyone here is really pretty supportive and willing to offer feedback on member music, regardless of whether its their particular cup of tea. Nice group of people...

But you fuck up on the link and leave them nothing to do and these cunts are brutal.
We're all just trying to distract ourselves from Phantasma's thread.
^

:lol: :lol: :lol:
This is gonna give John Cage's "4:33" a run for it's money
Arrangement is very minimalist, but also open to listener interpretation.
I fell asleep within a few minutes of posting this. I knew I forgot something.
You know, I find that everyone here is really pretty supportive and willing to offer feedback on member music, regardless of whether its their particular cup of tea. Nice group of people...

But you fuck up on the link and leave them nothing to do and these cunts are brutal.
To be fair, if he did a good job of really nailing the intricacies of the pop genre conventions, he probably shared all of the really important and interesting elements of the tune. :yesway:
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